10 motorcycle safety rules to follow in south East Asia

A busy road way in Da Lat, Vietnam.

1. Slow down. Yes, there is not a strong regulatory force here, and it's likely that no one will stop you from speeding. But so many accidents are caused by simply driving too fast and it's absolutely not worth it. A traveler I know died in northern Thailand due to a head on collision. Just slow down to avoid these.

Riding a motorbike in the rainy season.... it's a lot of fun!

2. Don't expect great road conditions. 

Roads here come and go as they please, sometimes great, sometimes just a dirt road. You don't want to be searching for the apex of a hair pin-turn, knee down, throttle wide open, engine revving, when suddenly you realize- oh crap- this brand new, pristine road is about to turn into gravel.

3. Don't drink and drive. The first thing to go when we drink is our judgment. “Yea, I can make that jump.” “Of course I can do five shots in five minutes.” So we generally think that we're ok to drive when we're not, and we often take unnecessary risks with our lives. Just don't do it- it's not worth buying your rent shop a new bike, and it's not worth spending your vacation in a hospital bed. I've encountered SO MANY people who have crashed their bike while high / drunk, and some have gotten really hurt.

4. Lock up your bike. Theft is common in South East Asia, and you don't want to lose your beautiful piece of machinery. The rent shops will often demand $600 - $1500 for a replacement bike. You may also want to rent a cheap, crappy looking bike to avoid attracting thieves. I once returned a beautiful scooter because the guy told me it was well over a thousand dollars to replace if it was stolen.

Who needs an SUV to go shopping?

5. Know how to brake. Avoid using your front brake on slippery surfaces, such as gravel, dirt, sand, or mud, because it can slip out from under you and you will tumble to the ground. I like to do about 70% of the braking with my rear tire and 30% with the front, just as a habit. But remember that if your REAR tire slips out, you might be able to recover. If your FRONT tire slips out, you're going down. Also remember, braking gets a lot harder when you've got passengers or extra gear on the bike. Like this guy here.

6. Check out your machine before you rent / buy it. These rent shops will rent out a bike until it absolutely dies, and these things can have 30,000 miles on them, often times more. That's a lot of wear and tear, so make sure all the components work before you pay. I once rented a scooter and found that the front wheel alignment was off. The guy fixed this by having his friend hold the handlebars while he kicked the tire as hard as he could to correct it. I passed on the bike. Check the brakes FIRST. Then check the lights, blinker, brake light, gear shift, horn, tire alignment, etc.

This will happen to you if you ride without
eye protection. Or if you sing "Let it Go" again.

7. Wear a helmet and sunglasses. A friend of mine was breaking rule 1 (going too fast) and breaking rule 7 (no sunglasses) when he caught a few small pebbles in the eye. He spent the next day in excruciating pain, went to the optometrist, had the pebbles removed with tweezers, then had to put in antibiotic drops that were quite painful to the eye, several times a day for the next 6 days. Don't do this, just wear the freaking gear!

8. Use your horn. You are a tiny speck on the road, so that means you have to be very vocal, let people know you're there. Use it when you see someone about to pull into the road, or when you see someone merging lanes, or when going through busy intersections, as people often ignore the lights and just go.

Maybe carry less money than this...

9. Carry a few small bills in your pocket in case of a bribe. The police in some South East Asian countries are hungry for bribes, and when they see foreigners, they think money. So you should always have one or two dollars in your pocket, ready to pay up. Notice I said pocket, not wallet. You don't want to pull out your wallet and show that you have $40, because then he'll ask for $40, instead of $1. Here's a story from southern Cambodia. A friend was on his scooter and got pulled over. He had no money in his pocket, but had his wallet in his scooter cabinet. As soon as he opened the cabinet, the cop began inspecting it. He found the tiniest little piece of marijuana. Now my friend probably could have gotten away with this, had he had a 20, maybe even a 10 dollar bill, but all he had in his wallet was a clean, fresh $100 bill. The cop took the $100. So, first of all, don't travel with illegal drugs. But also, keep a few small bills on you- not in your wallet, not in your cabinet, so that you can easily just pay the $1 and not go through any additional hassle. Another friend of mine keeps two wallets on him, one that is his real wallet, and another that only has $2 in it, so he can show the cop the fake wallet and say, “Hey, that's all I have...”

10. Take detailed pictures of bike before you leave the rent shop. Not all renters are honest, and some will charge you for scrapes or scuffs on the bike that were already there. They will also overcharge for any scrape or scratch that you put on the bike, so be extra careful.

How do I love my motorbike... Let me count the ways

These are my safety rules, although I'm sure you'll add many more as you adapt to whatever city / country you're in.

My life in Cambodia

 This is me.

 

These are the things that crawl around while I sleep. It's a beetle, about half the size of your thumb. They're also the stupidest creatures on the planet. They can fly, but always flit about like a drunk man in a helicopter, crashing into walls and the ceiling.

 

These are some of my students, I volunteer at a nearby school and I teach English to some of the kids around town. They're happy because they got t-shirts from a volunteer.

This is them cleaning up our classroom. The fellow in back is our Khmer teacher- his name is Passet and he helps with the translating.

This is the general road condition (dirt / gravel) and the general backdrop. (ocean) We did get a few paved roads put in last year though.

This is where I spend most of my days. Seriously. The water is almost as warm as bathwater, and it's a joy to swim in. Why would I leave?

This is what I play with. Cambodia is full of wild cats and dogs. They breed like crazy, so there are oodles of puppies and kittens.

 
This is us trying out our first art day. It was, as expected, chaos. I never should have brought out the glitter. There is still glitter all over our floors and tables.

 
This is the the kids playing after class. I have to maintain order or they'll fight over the frisbee. They're great kids though, and I really enjoy playing around with them.

Here are some cute monkeys. A friend showed them to me, in a random spot of the jungle. It's not part of a nature reserve or a zoo, it's just where they hang out.

 
Here's a video of some cute, baby monkeys.

This is a scorpion. A living one. A friend of mine found it at her hostel and kept it as a pet. His name is Napoleon and he's huge. Yea, don't walk barefoot.

Getting off the grid. Going to Cambodia.

There's a lot to dislike about Cambodia. Poverty, hunger, and corruption are all rampant. Crossing the border is a pain in the ASS. There's no such thing as health and safety laws. Ground travel is always hard, as most of the roads look to have been built around the late 60's.

But my first day back in my little beach town, I was reminded why I returned. It's hard to explain without sounding a little pretentious, but it's the first place I've been to in a long time that felt real.

What do I mean by real?

Well, I think that in this modern world it's become hard to find something that's not polished and glazed over to resemble everything else. We westerners have a tendency to embrace the facade; we go to a foreign country and then eat only Burger King and Mcdonald's. We visit somewhere exotic, then expect the locals to speak perfect English. We spend so much time and energy getting as far away from home as possible, and then seek out all things familiar.

And so many people encourage this behavior that when you truly want to get away... there just aren't many options left. It's gotten so bad that I find myself fleeing from places with Mcdonald's, and movie theatres, and Disney gift shops. I've run from paved roads, and shopping malls, and women with little chihuahuas inside Gucci handbags. I've run from big screen TV's and people who talk about what embarrassing thing celebrities are doing now. I've run and run and now... I've arrived.

Birthday boy in Bangkok

The king turned 87 on December 5^th, and Bangkok threw him one hell of a party. 
 
The king even made an appearance, or, almost. His appearance was canceled at the last minute. Hundreds of thousands (millions?) of people wore yellow in honor of the king, and as you can see in the pictures, yellow is everywhere.
 

Politics divides the citizens of Thailand, with people fiercely loyal to either side. But the king, who has very little power in the government, tends to stay away from politics. Instead he goes around the country giving money to poor people and creating projects that make jobs. You know, things the government should be doing. So, while people may have different political loyalties, they all love the king.

He commands great respect in the country, and his face is EVERYWHERE. Just look at the people who turned out to see him. This picture below represents a TINY fraction of the people who went to honor the king. Seriously, to my left was a massive field, the size of three or four football fields- filled end to end with people.

Also, obligatory fireworks.

Side note: People often think of Bangkok as the place to come party and get drunk and be obnoxious. But that's really only with foreigners. Even though there were massive crowds, the locals were super respectful. I didn't see anyone drinking, and I didn't see anyone acting like an ass. I mean, come one, this is Thailand. Not Korea...

What's that smell?

The end of summer has a unique smell in Seoul. I liken it to the subtle odor of burning farts; other people say it's more like vomit. Either way it’s not pleasant.

In September or so, these berries emerge from the Gingko trees that are all around Seoul.

The berries fall to the ground, I actually got hit by a few on their way down. People will step on the berries, as they coat the sidewalk and they’re impossible to avoid.

As they get squished and bake in the autumn sun, they let out a pungent fragrance. The skunks of the plant world maybe. So if you're in Seoul in late summer / early autumn, watch out for the berries!

Check out this article if you really want to learn all about smelly trees of Seoul.

http://e360.yale.edu/feature/peter_crane_history_of_ginkgo_earths_oldest_tree/2646/

The Pope is in Seoul

The pope is in Seoul, and it’s kind of a big deal. It’s the first time a pope has come to Asia in 15 years. Also, North Korea threw a bit of a tantrum at his arrival, launching some rockets into the ocean. I don’t know what they were hoping to accomplish with this action.


Seoul practically shut down at his arrival. There were police EVERYWHERE. Seriously, everywhere. Estimates put the police numbers at around 30,000. Estimates also put the number of attendees at the pope’s mass to be around a million people. An actual million people. So the streets and train stations within a 5 kilometer perimeter were all shut down.


There were also some protests when the pope arrived. These protests weren't against the pope, but were using his arrival as an opportunity to highlight the issues going on in Seoul. Two of these big issues are workers’ rights and wages, as well as the ferry tragedy, which took the lives of hundreds of people, mostly high school aged children.

Overall, it's been an interesting experience to see just how a city reacts when the pope comes to town. Also, pope shirts...

Japan on $30

Question: it’s your last night in Japan. You have no lodging. You have 30 dollars, minus the 7 dollars you spent on ramen. What do you for a whole day and night?

As an icing on the cake, all the hostels, hotels, and couchsurfing spaces are full because of a festival you didn’t know about when you booked your tickets. So even if you had money, you STILL wouldn’t have a bed to sleep in.

The answer to the quandary… Manga café!

Manga cafes are open 24 hours. They have a vast supply of Japanese comic books and computers, and you can even rent a small room. Other times it’s more of a cubicle.

You pay per hour, usually between 3 and 6 dollars per hour. I got my cubicle and it was surprisingly comfortable. The floor of the cubicle was a pad, about as soft as a bed, and it had enough room for me to stretch out in, and even came with a pillow. The people were all very quiet, and there was even a shower in the bathroom.

Now, due to my lack of funds I could only afford a cubicle for 6 hours. 9 pm to 3 am. I was out on the street at 3 am, and had several hours until my 12 o’clock departure.

Having spent 7 dollars on the ramen, 20 dollars on my manga café, I had 3 dollars left. Now, in most countries, 3 dollars won’t get you much more than a candy bar and a soda. Not so in Japan! You actually have a lot of options here.

711, Family Mart, Daily Miyazaki are all convenience stores with some great options. $1.60 slabs of fried chicken. $1 rice balls. $1 cups of sake (for the drinker on a budget). But when you’re looking for cost, taste, and the feeling of being full, nothing beats a Matsuya (or the almost as good Yoshinoya).

You’re gonna want to go with the gyudon. This is a bowl of rice with strips of grilled beef and onions on top. It’s served alongside a small bowl of miso soup and all the water you can drink. The cheapest option and smallest portion size is about $2.30. But a $2.80 bowl is surprisingly filling, and many people actually struggle to finish this one.

So at this point it’s 4 am, I’m out of money, and have about 8 hours left until my departure. Not a whole lot to be done. I had no money for bus fare so I walked to the ferry (about two miles away) and spent the rest of the morning enjoying the sunrise, practicing my Japanese with a homeless man, and trying to stay out of the rain.

Long story short: when you’ve got next to no money, and no substantial options for food or lodging, just know there’s a manga café and a Matsuya waiting for you. Also, bring cash to Japan, never expect a foreign bank card to work, even if it’s worked countless times before.